He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
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