I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
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