Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
