Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
there was a trapeze. enough said
he told me I talked like a deaf person
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Randomize
