She said her name was "party"
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
