It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
