He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
