I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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