TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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