i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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