Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Randomize
