NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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