We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
