yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
