could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
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