just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
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