Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
