Moan for me like Helen Keller
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Randomize
