I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
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