I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants