I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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