the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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