1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
I'd wear matching sweaters with you
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize