My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
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