Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize