I puked a lego.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Randomize
