i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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