Have you finally orgasmed yet?
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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