Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
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