Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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