so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
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Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
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Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
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