we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize
