We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
