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• (256): View more from Alabama

  The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.

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• (507): View more from Minnesota

  there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut

  Fav 40 6100 1243

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• (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?

  (816): View more from Missouri

  yes. helicopter.

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  23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (516): View more from New York

  i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.

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• (865): View more from Tennessee

  Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night

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• (704): View more from North Carolina

  Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"

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• (914): View more from New York

  Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested

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• (613): View more from Ontario

  Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.

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• 

  The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral

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• (707): View more from California

  My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?

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• (573): View more from Missouri

  Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.

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• (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?

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• (309): View more from Illinois

  Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool

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• (407): View more from Florida

  Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that

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