He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Randomize
