belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Randomize
