I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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