Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
