I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
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