i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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