I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Randomize