I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
This gyro tastes like lonliness
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
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