i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Non-Jews are for practice
Tip for today: never try to fart and swallow at the same time. You'll end up choking on whatever you are currently swallowing and shit yourself from the freakout of choking.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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