didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize