Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
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