FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
Randomize
