How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
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