I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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