nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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