i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hippo gnu deer
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Randomize