I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
3 2 1 whiskey
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
