Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Randomize
